Powder Keg

All my life I've had weird fantasies. I'm not talking about sexual fantasies or fetishes, I'm just talking about daydreams in which situations are favorable to me.

One such fantasy was either dying or getting really really sick when I was younger. Like, cancer or multiple limb removal. The idea was that my situation would be so horrible that everyone I knew would HAVE to pay attention to me, blanket me with pity and presents, be nice to me.

Another has been to be involved with a real revolution, one that would terribly revoke the kinds of lives we all enjoy today. It would start with a basic fight against the tyranny and giant thumb holding us all down. From there it would quickly escalate to martial law, hyper-combative dystopia, hide-and-seek-or-die, and finally post-apocalypse.

It is the latter fantasy I hold very close to my heart as I read the reports coming in regarding occupy wall street in various cities. I see the videos, I read the tweets, the first hand accounts, and all I can wonder is if there is some way I could get involved. Or maybe help to increase the rate of change. Or something.

I'm a little stuck, however. Like many others, I think, I'm trapped. I have a family I have to protect and fend for. I have to keep providing shelter and food. I have to keep them safe. However, I have a deep-seeded urge to join in the protests, the fights. I don't wish harm upon anyone truly, but I do think that there are times when those in power need to realize where they receive their power from. It's like the French Revolution, or any other coup or struggle by the people against the ruling class.

I want to get involved, but I cannot. I don't use a bank, I'm a member of a local member-owned credit union. I don't use big companies for anything but the essentials like utilities (something that is required by law to remain in my house, btw). I do as much as I can without giving up everything, but I'm in fear that this is slowly becoming not good enough.

Were the dam to break, were there to be a serious revolution spark, I'm not sure I know what I would do. I don't own any weapons, I don't have a fortress out in the country somewhere.

I do have a really close network of friends, perhaps we could all huddle together somewhere to figure out a next step. You know, if something were to light the powder keg.

Or maybe everything will just blow over and nothing will change at all.

Reality Augmentation

For the past two years, I was using an iPhone 3G. Not 3GS, but a 3G. I knew there were cool things going on with the newer phones, but was content with the fact that I was using a phone that I didn't have to pay for. Work got me the 3G just before the 3GS came out, and I just sorta sat back and waited.

Our contract with AT&T just ended, and now we're on some crazy fast network, with new 4S phones, and it's pretty cool.

I'm most impressed so far with all the augmented reality apps. Might seem like old news to some people, but I really want this to take off. I want to be able to wear sunglasses that tell me things like the weather, how fast I'm travelling, and do facial recognition to people I pass on the street and tell me things about them. "Oh, that person is a wanted criminal? Oh, that person over there is a famous author? Oh, this person does exactly what I do at work, and is hiring?"

You know it would be cool.

Laryngitis is all gone, but I think I need to get something to finish clearing out this phlegm. Still coughing and it hurts.

I'm also looking into buying a car. Nothing new or expensive, but the beast I've been driving needs new tires. I don't want to spend >$500 on tires when $1000 will buy a car. I'm thinking maybe I'll get a small loan from my credit union, use it to pay off the other loan, sell that car, pay back some people I owe big time, and drive something smaller with newer tires.

Or maybe I'll just buy a shit-ton of twinkies.

Update for elevenseses

The trip was great. At some point I decided that we would be like a leaf in a stream. I didn't want any sort of harsh schedule of events, any requirements, any thing that we HAD to do.

When we landed, we made my brother-in-law take us to In-and-Out, since we don't have any of those back home. We drove through the ghetto of Portland, in the pitch black night, to secure greasy fast food. This is ironic but will become apparent later in the story.

Mom was tense and sad at first, but slowly started to feel better, I think.

We saw some sights over the ten days we were there, but the food was what was really great about Portland. Got to see the Pacific Ocean, something that was on my bucket list. And I got to see my neice and nephew!

The kids handled the flights and airport shit like pros. Maybe it was the coaching, the prep talks, I don't know. But they were great.

On the way to the airport, my father-in-law got a flat tire. We swapped it out in like ten minutes, but it was hectic.

This post is hectic, I'm jumping around way too much, but I keep remembering flashes instead of a solid, consistent timeline.

When we got back into town, I started feeling sick, then go laryngitis! I'm just now getting over it, something like ten days later.

Anyway, short update post today, next week should get back to normal with weird observations and so forth.