Scary Funnels

Sometimes I turn off the wake up alarm in the mornings and drift back to sleep. Usually when I do this, I seem to drop right back into deep sleep, the kind with weird dreams. This morning was no exception.

I don't remember much at this point, but what I do recall was that my family all lived in a very old single floor house, no basement, and everything looked brown. Sorta like a black and white movie, but brown. Not sepia tone, because people were full color, and mirrors weren't brown tinged. It was as if everything was made of wood perhaps?

Anyway, I think I was cooking? Chopping veggies? Suddenly the lights went off, and I could see through a huge window that some really serious storm clouds were rolling in fast. They were dark but had accents of a weird electric blue. Like a plane went overhead and dropped some really sharp blue dye into a big body of swampy, oily dark water, and that water became a cloud with little swirlies in it.

I see the clouds and know something bad is about to happen, so I start shouting for my family. They're not in the house, they're all hanging out in and around some weird smaller building in the back yard. It's like a garage, but without cars. There's a deck on one side with a bunch of chairs and stools and so forth.

I run outside, and as I'm running to them, I see a HUGE funnel cloud come out of nowhere and churn slowly, almost softly. There was very little noise that I could remember, maybe a low hum? The churning cloud seems to be lazily mouthing the countryside and in its wake there's nothing. It's not even like it leaves behind destruction, the ground is just completely stripped, like how a very efficient vacuum cleaner leaves behind no crumbs.

I get closer to my family and I'm shouting and pointing at the cloud (like, how the fuck can you miss a big electric churning funnel cloud the size of Oklahoma coming at you?), and they're all laughing, drinking lemonade, chillin. I believe there were snacks on a table.

In a way, looking back now, this all sounds very Black Hole Sun-ey, but at the time that wasn't the feeling. It was more like the cloud was only visible to me, and no one else cared.

At any rate, I convince everyone to huddle down inside the house. We're in there for what seems like forever, then I kinda check it out to see if it's safe to come out. I look outside and there's hundreds of these tornadoes, just like the first one but with different color swirls in the cloud. A green one comes by and scoops up the house, and me, and I wake up screaming.